- Dec 6, 9 pm-midnight, Junction Restaurant/Bar in Santa Fe (Affordables)
- Dec 7, wedding in Santa Fe (solo!!!)
- Dec 14, Los Alamos Family Council event (Craig Martin Experience)
------------------------------------------------------------
Now onto the quitting.
This post was a tough one to write. I don't have any "drank too much and lost my job" or "ran my car into a tree" stories. The fact is, I've never been much of a drinker, and my partying days are long past. Because there are no sordid details, some might consider this a boring story. It will certainly never make mainstream news! But, the fact is, I quit drinking, and I did so because it diminished my quality of life another way: it triggered migraines.
It started this past summer, or rather, I noticed it this past summer. Maybe it was there all along and I was able to ignore it before. At any rate, these headaches, combined with a stomach thing that lasted for about a month, left me feeling crappy for much of this past summer. The migraines would start with a dizzy spell (I never got the "classic" visual symptoms) and go downhill from there, often requiring total sensory deprivation to provide any relief. Ibuprofen doesn't touch my migraines, even at the maximum recommended dose (by my doctor, which is higher than the directions on the bottle). Excedrin was the remedy of choice, but acetaminophen rides a fine line between effectiveness and liver damage, so I was hesitant to use it much. The migraine thing finally got so bad I started to look for lifestyle changes I could make. My dad used to get migraines, too, and his were triggered by peanuts, of all things. Everything I read about migraines suggested a trigger of some kind. After a summer of this sh*t--ruined days of dizziness and pain--I finally hit on the trigger. It was a combination of alcohol and changing light conditions, such as playing in a dimly lit bar with flashing lights, or driving at night after a beer or two (even after several hours from beer to car).
The night that started this line of thought was late in the summer when Northern New Mexico (and much of the Central & Southern Rockies, really) was being hit with record-shattering rain and thunderstorms. The Affordables had a late night gig at a local bar, and I was into my second (and, as it turned out, last) beer when the lightning started. The bar has windows all around, and the flashing against the dark while trying to concentrate on playing and reading music started the headache. By the time the show was over and we were packed up, I was not looking forward to the drive home and I knew I wasn't going to have a great next day. By the time I got home, I was shivering, headache-y, and nauseous. At first I thought it was food poisoning, but when I get food poisoning it's usually obvious from the, um, flow. This was something else.
As a scientist, I of course had to experiment (cartoon from www.sodahead.com).
I'm not sure if you've ever been "on the wagon," but it was really difficult for me--a long-term social drinker--to say no to a drink. I love bourbon. I enjoy beer and wine. Recently I was playing a gig with the Affordables for a local Beer Co-op, and, you guessed it, there was an ample supply. The classic "devil on one shoulder, angel on the other" scene ensued.
"Come on, just one beer. It's Halloween!" the devil said.
"You'll regret it in the morning!" the angel said.
"Oh, but it's Marble [a good brewery out of Albuquerque]! And an IPA."
"But you [like other social drinkers] can't have just one!"
"Everyone else is having one. Look how much fun they're having!"
"You still have to drive home."
And on and on.
In the end, the thought of being dizzy and unable to hang out with my family in any meaningful way the next day was reason enough to stick with water and seltzer. And, even though I didn't get to bed until 1:30 AM that morning, I was still able to get up at 6:30 and function. I'm trying as hard as I can to paint this in a positive light. Not drinking saves me money and probably makes me a better musician. But it still feels unfair. Bar gigs are a great opportunity to drink because the bar owners usually buy the band a round or two. And there is nothing like a cold beer on a hot afternoon. But, with every day that passes, the "why me?" feeling fades. It becomes easier and easier to say "club soda with a lime" or "ginger ale" rather than "Marble IPA." That happy-hour-on-Friday desire to drink is even fading. And there are far fewer calories in a club soda than a beer.
----------------------------------------------------
Thanks for enduring my tales of woe and righteous indignation. Hopefully you enjoyed what you read, and that I inspired you to let go of some of your unnecessary obligations or baggage, or make some changes that improve your life in another way. Of course, I'm not advocating that you leave the loving embrace of your family and friends, nor am I suggesting you quit your passions and jobs. But, if change comes your way, be open to it. It just might open doors and possibilities you never considered.
-----------------------------------------------------
My next posts will get back to art, craft, and music, I swear!
Thanks for reading, and have a great week.
Root beer is still in the fridge here. I'll save it for you.
ReplyDeleteI did not know you had headaches. You have had falls in hiking, skiing and other events that may contribute to that pain too. I am sorry, to hear this, as you are so young.
ReplyDeleteThe headache thing was really only this summer, thankfully, and I think I found the cause and the cure. I have suffered other consequences from my, well, active lifestyle, like back, wrist, hip, and ankle stuff. Most days I'm thankful that I am alive and can walk!
Delete